L o v e I s
( A c o u s t i c )
B o B u r n h a m
+ This file is Jordan Lapping’s own work and represents his +
+ interpretation of the song. You may only use this file for +
+ private study, scholarship, or research. The contents may not +
+ be duplicated for use with other websites without written +
+ permission. Thank you for understanding. Enjoy. +
Tabbed by Jordan Lapping
Tuning: E (Standard)
CHORDS USED: C D Em G G7e]---0----2----0----3----1---|B]---1----3----0----3----0---|G]---2----2----0----0----0---|D]---2----0----2----0----0---|A]---3---------2----2----2---|E]-------------0----3----3---|
G - G7 - C - D
G G7 C D I love you like kings love queens, like a gay geneticist loves designer genes
G G7 C D I need you like New Orleans needs a drought, like Hitler's father needed to learn to pull out
G G7 C D And I want you, yeah, like a lawyer/mathematician wants some kind of proof
G G7 C D C D G And I want you, yeah, like JFK wanted a car with a roof...
(G) C Em D Because love is taking that dive, then getting really comfortable and peeing in the pool
G C Em D And love is a real life porn, minus all the stuff that makes porn cool
G C Em D And love is a homeless guy searching for treasure in the middle of the rain
G C Em D And finding a bag of gold coins and slowly finding out they're all filled with chocolate
G C Em D And even though he's heart broken, he can't complain because he was hungry in the first place...
G - G7 - C - D
G G7 C D Because I love you like Dora loves maps, like the Pope's toilet loves "holy craps"
G G7 C D I need you like a voyeur needs a branch, like boys tossing salad needs a little bit of Neverland
C D G And I want you, yeah, like all the gothic kids that look exactly the same, never want to conform
G7 C D C D N/C G And I want you like Anne Frank wanted nobody to read her fucking diary!
INTERLUDE [continue G chord]:
"Because a diary is a collection of secret things that nobody's supposed to read,
that's the whole point of a diary. Millions of people that have breached this little girls privacy
after she was chased by Nazis - kick her while she's down..."
G7 C D And if we met in ten thousand BC, I was your caveman, you's my cavelady...
G G7 If we got hot - we'd start rubbin', if we got hungry - we'd go clubbin'
C D There's wooly mammoths, but I will protect us - you're making me devolve to a Homo Erectus
C D And if we met in 1780, I would be a white southern aristocratic plantation owner
and you were my dark-skinned servant lady... (slave)
G G7 Whenever I could get away from the Missus, I go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses
C D But let's be serious, I'd still work you full-time as a slave
There's a difference between romantic language and complete disregard for socio economic trends...
C D If it was 1941, I was a Nazi, you's a Gypsy on the run - that's a little redundant
G G7 C D That probably wouldn't have worked out...
C D G C Em D Because love is your favorite food for every breakfast, lunch and dinner
G C Em D And love is the Holocaust - if you don't die quick and you don't get thinner
G C Em D And love is being the owner of the company that makes rape whistles
G C Em D And even though you started the company with good intentions trying to reduce the rate of rape,
G C Em now you don't want to reduce it at all, 'cause if the rape rate declines
D G G7 you'll see an equal decline in whistle sales...
C D G G7 Without rapists, who's gonna buy your whistles?
C D G Yeah, love is all about... whistles